i seem to be missing my dreams lately. i do remember a snippet from this morning's dream, but for the past week, i seem to have blank sleep cycles.

neko: *stares at Wolfen*
W: what?
neko: *Jiii--*
W: it wasn't me. =___=
neko: i know. hehe.
W: =__= *bonks*
neko: owwie~ *pout*
W: hah...

*Kuro is thankful i am not annoying him today. lucky bastard. *pats his arm<--neko too short!* heh.*






<3

have you ever found yourself in a nightmare and forcefully woken yourself up, only to realize you are still dreaming?

it's like being aware of 3 realities--or in this case, 3 continuities.

it doesn't matter which one is 'real,' after all, you are only trying to get away from the nightmare, and any 'reality' is better than that.

right?

it all started with those red, dandelion-like, flower things. 3d, eight- and red-stalked like gumamela pistils. all seven points had the red tip, except the one a the bottom which was yellow--pollen-filled, i thought.

i was parking my mother's old celeste before it happened. i remember an uncle and his wife with us in the concrete parking lot. my mother blew away the first flower-thing that floated down. there was thunder then, and lightning. the sky had turned into a mixture of grays and oppressing hues of storm-blue...and when i looked around, the flower-things had become so huge, and they had formed petals like floating darkness...

then we ran.

i remember a lecture hall, (although i only thought it was a lecture hall..i was, after all, only in the lobby) we met up with my father there. we took his car. i remember being handed office supplies and dumping them in a can in the trunk. (paperclips?) i sat in the backseat.

i wonder though, if that place was a hotel or inn of sorts. because i had remembered that i forgot Puji and had wanted to go back in to retrieve him. but it was the end o the world after all, and we were in a hurry.

Mikhail was there though, in my arms. curled up against my chest. i think he was wearing shorts...

a close family friend was left behind. or rather, he stayed behind. his task was to keep them calm. he would take care of everyone.

i think my mother was scared, but not to the point of hysterics and such.

we drove to a red-orange soil desert-like place. there was a structure like stairs. we sat on the steps. but there was this man sitting beside my mother. he was harrassing her, or so it seemed. i screamed at him and wanted to beat the shit out of him for messing with my mother. my father switched places with her to stop the commotion. all throughout, i sat between my mother and father.

but we left that place. (was there a plane? another car? i do not know.)

we found ourselves (just the three of us) in the street near our old house. i remember my father saying that we needed to ge back to our car. so he borrowed a rental car from the white-grilled shop. (the old parlor wasn't it? or was it the pharmacy?) the lady had first handed him a white envelope. i had read the words [lifetime insurance]. my father said he didn't need it. she handed him car keys instead.

i remember a white car. we were supposed to drive back to our car, the one we left at that red-orange desert. then drive again (in our car this time) to somwhere...

i remember searching for a sacred place, a sanctuary: Holy Ground.

i think i wondered why Mikhail was there curled up in my arms... and how come i was so calm, even though i knew that the world would end.

when i woke up, the sky was gray and the room too warm.

i don't think i can face Mikhail today.

i wonder, if i'll actually forget Puji.

some how...i don't want that to happen--forget Puji that is...

but now that i think about it, i wasn't [fear] that bothered me. something else...something that i missed...

[since paople are too lazy to go to my blog, CUT & PASTE galore~ *sigh*]

firstly, *huggles* to CC-kun and Yuni-chan. you guys made me feel loved and understood. thanks.

with that said, let me tell you what happened the next day!

i didn't talk. yesh. at least not 'first' to talk to them. then since i had volunteer stuff the whole day (saturday's pretty busy for me ^^) i had the chance to say out of the house the whole day~ ^^ well, almost, since i had to go back home around 13:00 and eat and wait up until around 15:30 to leave for my next volunteer thing. but the day was fun for me. ^^

i had packed interesting stuff (that is, i've moved up from packing just cds & tapes to the books now ^^ yay!) at Friends of the Library from 10:00 to 13:00. then Peggy dropped me off and i had lunch at home, fixed a couple of things, then walked to the library for my seocond volunteer with Heidi for Arts Drop In. we had to pick up one of the kids for it then Claudia explained stuff about the daycare center activity we might be interested in helping in. after all the introductions and explanations, Heidi asked if we had any plans and stuff. Christine (the kid we had to pick up), suggested that we go for ice cream at Steveston. so Heidi drove us there and we had ice cream! ^^ i got green tea and it was sooooo good! ^^ Christine had chocolate. ^^ but Heidi got herself a medium basket of cherries from the fruit stand since the ice cream shop only had dairy stuff. oh, and she got me a peach too! ^^ yum! ^^
we just spen the rest of the afternoon taking and sharing stories and all that. ^^ then we drove Christine home and heidi just dropped me off at the bus stop past Cook Rd. since i said i had plans to go to Halfmoon Bookstore (the 2nd hand manga shop).

i had to transfer buses at the Air Port Station, but i didn't have to wait long since the bus was there already. ^^ (see, sometimes you have to wait for about 30mins for the bus to arrive, esp. past 18:00) it was good too, coz the shop would just be open for another hour. ^^; anyway, once i got there, i amazing at the amount of manga in boxes on the floor! i mean, they were practically everywhere! i haven't visited for 2 years and my gosh! the collection here had doubled [if not tripled]! wow... i had a nice time chatting with Atsuko-san tho. ^^ she still remembers me. XD

i didn't really have much time to look around. not that they were closing, i wasn't just in the mood to stand infront of a shef and try to 'read' all the titles until i found what i liked... i mean, i already had a title in mind, since i know that once i step into that shop, i'd just lose what remains of my concentration and start floating. ^^; hehe. so i just got the 3rd volume (they only had 1-3 of it) of Hikari no Ko [spoiler: OMG!!!! Yuuta kissed her! OMG! *squee* and Uzura kissed back!! wai~!! <3 <3 <3 XD].*
~~~
*see how much i love this series?! *squee* x3 it's not overly shoujo (even tho it's in Asuka). and the main chara didn't go all "omg i kissed her -blush-" NO~! ^^ Yuuta-kun isn't like that. ^^ and if i explain anymore, it'll just sound too lame and spoil the whole thing. ^^ but one thing i can say, it is one of the better short-series manga that i've gotten my hands on. ^^ (Momo-chan! translate mo nmn~ XD)
~~~

anyway, that day ended pretty well. i was munching on the peach Heidi bought for me as i walked home! XD

oh! and last Friday, CC-kun's package* arrived! wai! X3 shooo cool~ X3 now, if only the tv would get fixed faster! >,>
~~~
*CC-kun's letter, Saikano series (vcd), Loki figure from Toy Con! <3
~~~

now, on to Sunday! ^^
we went to London Heritage Farm for the weekend event thing. ^^ they had antique stalls selling stuff, honey in small jars, jam... and the house where the London family used to live was really pretty! ^^ they even had a tea room inside! and the petting zoo with the cute animals~ (i sound like a kindergartener ^^; is that even a word?! O_o) but yeah, fun~ too bad mama didnt want to buy me that pretty silver ring... *sigh*

next, we went to the 'beach'. a place along the dike.. i think it was called Gary's Point? whatever..i dunno how that's spelled/called...but i liked the place..why? because i got to wade in the water. *bliss* the sound of water, the expanse of sand... i just love it! (will post pics later)

after we had lunch in that beach-like place, (and watched the kites, waded in the water), we drove to that park near the airport.. Iona?Io--something beach... where we picked wild blackberries from the bushes and ended up taking home at least 2kg worth of berries! XD it was tons of fun! (tho a little dangerous as the bushes were very prickly!) mama loved it. hehe. well, we all did. adventure stuff and berry-picking! XD

so that's my eventful weekend for you~ X3

now on to Monday!
nothing much...just the damn that-time-of-the-month pains that stopped me from going out and so i missed another day for skating lessons TT___TT oh well... i had a jumbled-up dream again...on random HP-ness and all that...(i was talking to Serverus?! O_o and what, we were discussing potions?! ^^; )

hmm... Tuesday, today..
one thing i'd like to share tho: dreamscape thing...
it was a sunny day..(summer here's pretty hot)..i remember a parking lot...i was with mama(?) or some other person... i got into a car with 2 girls, older than me.. but then i told them i was getting off as we were driving/turning to get out of the parking lot). i remember the girl in the front passenger seat had long lt.brown-blonde hair in a half pony.... then i was walking again... i met a group of guys in trendy outfits... i thought they looked pretty cool... turns out i know(?) them... got into their car... i think it was a convertible... drove aroud, but got out coz i thought to myself "this isn't the company i keep"... strange really... then i remember the whole place turning bluish... like viewing the whole thing behind a blue filter... a sleek dog on a leash was standing a way infront of me and mama(?). we were talking about "poor dog, i wish someone would take him home" and my mom mentioning something aobut "abandoned". but as we were walking towards it (me with the intention of actually going near the dog), some chinese girl with long hair walked up to the dog and took off it's leash+collar and lead it away... mama turned in another direction and i followed her, slightly disappointed that i didn't get to pat the dog or got a closer look. but as we passed by/i looked back, the dog was then bounding after the girl that led her, a car wizzed by, and i saw the dog clearly at that moment... it was the color of the midnight sky, it's fur a shimmering dark blue.... and i was like "wow..." ...i find it pretty strange tho... ^^; never had that kind of encounter before..^^; maybe i've been seeing too many dogs (we were in the park during the weekend and saw lots of dogs & owners...) hehe...

oh well... there goes..
i'll just post something when other eventful stuff happens to me.. XD
ja ne~